12 Qualities to look for in a spouse as a Christian
If you’re a Christian man or woman on the journey to find your life partner, you know that the process can be both exciting and overwhelming. As believers, we know that finding a spouse is a significant decision, one that should be approached with prayer, wisdom, and discernment.
The truth is, not every person you meet who is a self-professing Christian with God’s child, God’s beloved, Abba’s favourite, Abba’s baby girl in their social media bio is genuinely saved.
In this article, we will look into those qualities that can make it a lot easier to find out if this person you have met is genuine. So, grab your cup of tea or smoothie and let’s dive into the 12 qualities you should look for in a spouse, backed by timeless scriptures.
Qualities to look for in a Christian Spouse
Faith in God: A Solid Rock to Build Upon
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.” (Proverbs 3:5)
Faith is not a mere notion; it is the cornerstone upon which strong relationships are founded. Seek a partner whose devotion to God resonates through their actions and choices. Look beyond a superficial Sunday spirituality – seek a soul whose faith is steadfast, illuminating the path through life’s challenges. A partner who stands strong in faith not only enriches your spiritual journey but binds you together in a shared walk of devotion.
Kindness and Compassion: The Language of Love
“Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” (Ephesians 4:32)
Amidst the hustle of daily life, finding a companion who radiates kindness and empathy is akin to discovering a rare gem. A heart filled with love and compassion reflects the very essence of God’s grace. Seek a partner whose actions speak volumes about their love, not just for you, but for everyone they encounter. A loving heart creates an atmosphere of acceptance, understanding, and affection, making the journey of life a more joyous one.
Integrity: The Cornerstone of Trust
“The integrity of the upright guides them, but the unfaithful are destroyed by their duplicity.” (Proverbs 11:3)
In the tapestry of lasting relationships, honesty and integrity form the intricate threads that bind souls together. A spouse who embodies these virtues stands as a trustworthy pillar. Consistency in words and actions builds trust and transparency, nurturing a foundation where love can flourish unencumbered by doubt. Choose a partner whose character is steadfast and rooted in ethical principles.
Humility: A Heart That Puts Others First
“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves.” (Philippians 2:3)
The beauty of humility lies in its power to foster selflessness. A heart that prioritizes others and places their needs before its own reflects the essence of Christ’s teachings. A humble partner engenders a spirit of cooperation, fostering an environment where respect and consideration are paramount. Choose a companion who carries themselves with humility, for their actions will mirror the selfless nature of Christ.
Patience: Standing Strong Through Life’s Challenges
“Love is patient, love is kind.” (1 Corinthians 13:4)
As life’s tides ebb and flow, a patient partner becomes an invaluable anchor. The enduring love described in the Bible emphasizes the strength of patience. Seek someone who stands unwaveringly by your side during trials and tribulations, demonstrating a love that transcends circumstances. A patient spouse is a steadfast supporter, a constant reminder that love’s endurance is a testament to its resilience.
Shared Values: Walking Together in Faith
“Can two walk together, unless they are agreed?” (Amos 3:3)
A shared spiritual foundation is the compass that guides couples through the labyrinth of life. Seek a partner whose beliefs align with your own, as a united faith deepens understanding and provides a common purpose. A shared spiritual journey strengthens the bond, fostering unity and reinforcing the belief that, together, you can overcome any obstacle. You can both be Christians and yet your values don’t quite align so be sure to find out what the core of their beliefs are. Things like Tithing, prayer, speaking in tongues, fasting, faith, find out what they think on these things.
Communication Skills: Nurturing Understanding and Harmony
“Let your conversation be always full of grace.” (Colossians 4:6)
Effective communication is the bridge that spans misunderstandings and fosters connection. Seek a partner who actively listens, speaks kindly, and navigates conversations with grace. Such communication builds a safe space where both voices are heard and valued, nurturing understanding and harmony in your relationship.
Respect: Honoring Each Other’s Worth
“Each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.” (Ephesians 5:33)
Mutual respect forms the foundation of a thriving partnership. When each partner values the other’s thoughts, feelings, and opinions, an atmosphere of trust and appreciation flourishes. Seek a partner who holds your worth in high regard, and in turn, embraces your respect for their individuality. This dynamic nurtures an environment where both individuals are cherished and valued. Have you ever observed how Apostle Emmanuel Iren always celebrates his wife and her creative works as an author and movie director? Respecting the other person means you see their value and you respect the grace that they carry even if you are the more prominent or anointed one of the two.
Supportive Nature: Nurturing Dreams Together
“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor.” (Ecclesiastes 4:9)
Life’s journey becomes more enriching when shared with a supportive partner. Seek someone who not only encourages your aspirations but walks alongside you as you pursue them. A spouse who shares in your dreams offers inspiration, motivation, and a sense of camaraderie. Together, you can achieve far more than you ever could alone. Be careful to not get entangled with someone who will not support your dreams and instead will frustrate your efforts possibly because they are intimidated by your growing success. Look at Sunmisola Agbebi and Yinka Okeleye you see how supportive he has always been of her ministry even before marriage? That’s the kind of supportive spouse you should believe God for.
Emotional Maturity: Navigating Life’s Ups and Downs
“Fools give full vent to their rage, but the wise bring calm in the end.” (Proverbs 29:11)
Emotional maturity is the compass that guides couples through tumultuous seas. A partner who handles emotions with wisdom and restraint fosters an environment of empathy, understanding, and effective conflict resolution. Find someone who can navigate emotional storms with grace, for their strength in challenging moments brings stability to the relationship. Age is not maturity so you can easily tell if someone has emotional maturity by how they handle uncomfortable situations and confrontations.
Financial Responsibility: Stewardship and Partnership
“The plans of the diligent lead to profit as surely as haste leads to poverty.” (Proverbs 21:5)
Financial matters can be a source of strain if not managed wisely. Seek a partner who practices stewardship, and recognizes the importance of financial responsibility. Choosing someone who handles money with diligence and foresight contributes to a secure and harmonious future together. It’s not all about spirituality finding someone who is mindful of his finances and open about it is very important.
Humour and Joy: Sharing Laughter Along the Way
“A cheerful heart is good medicine.” (Proverbs 17:22)
In the midst of life’s challenges, a partner who can share a hearty laugh is a treasure. Laughter transcends language and cultural barriers, fostering a connection that’s steeped in joy. Seek a companion who brings a cheerful heart to the relationship, for their ability to find humour in the every day creates a bond that lightens the journey. Not all those brothers that will be squeezing face every time in the name of holiness. God help us!
Conclusion
As you embark on the quest to find a Christian spouse, remember that the Lord’s plan is perfect and His timing is impeccable. Prayerfully consider these qualities, seeking divine guidance as you navigate this meaningful journey. May your pursuit be blessed with wisdom, patience, and the immeasurable joy that springs from a love grounded in faith and shared values.
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