Living Mindfully: 5 Questions to Ask Yourself Before Making Choices

In 2018, I embarked on a journey towards a more mindful way of life – one that urged me to break free from the relentless pursuit of predefined milestones within set timelines. Prior to this shift, I was one to meticulously outline my life, projecting timelines for milestones such as marriage, children, career success, business ventures, car ownership, and home purchase.

Now, don’t get me wrong; setting goals and working toward them is commendable. I’ve achieved many of these goals. However, I began to ponder why I had set these particular aspirations in the first place. Chances are, you’ve also had similar ambitions at some point in your life. But have you ever questioned why?

Is this a concept of success ingrained in us by society, or is it genuinely aligned with our life’s purpose? Practicing mindfulness entails moments of self-reflection – times when you silence external influences and genuinely inquire why you desire what you do.

Here are five mindful questions to ask yourself before making a decision:

1. Why Am I Doing This?

Remember the saying, “When purpose is not known, abuse is inevitable”? Often, we find ourselves at a crossroads or uncertain about our next steps. In such moments, we might pursue activities merely because they seem lucrative or because everyone else is doing them.

For instance, in 2020, during a challenging period with no job, I dabbled in social media management and e-commerce site creation. It was exciting, and I might have continued down that path. However, I hastily decided to start a lash business just because it seemed promising. After some time, I realized it wasn’t the right fit for me. Just because others are doing something doesn’t mean it’s right for you. Part of mindfulness is recognizing when to stop pursuing something that doesn’t align with your true intentions.

Always ensure your motives are genuine. Base your choices on your true desires, not on trends or external pressures.

5 mindful questions to ask before you do anything

2. Who Am I Doing This For?

Many times, we claim to make sacrifices for others. But if we look within, are we truly doing it for their benefit? Consider parents who claim to work tirelessly for their children. Yet, their long work hours and business trips may leave little time to build close relationships. A decade passes, and the children they claimed to work for can barely engage in a 10-minute conversation because there’s no genuine connection.

Are you pursuing a particular course because you’re passionate about it, or solely for financial gain? Are you getting married because you’re genuinely happy with your partner or because your family believes it’s time and you’ve found someone available?

Ensure every decision aligns with the right reasons. Be intentional about your choices and authentic about whom you’re serving.

3. Is There an Easier Way to Do This?

In a world advocating for working smarter, not harder, many people remain attached to traditional, time-consuming methods. Sometimes, we resist accepting that there are more efficient approaches.

Consider my experience moving abroad: I insisted on hand-washing clothes during summer instead of using a washing machine. I believed my manual washing was superior, which might be true. However, this insistence consumed valuable time and energy. Eventually, I realized I was wasting precious resources by refusing to embrace modern conveniences.

You don’t have to DIY everything to feel accomplished. Sometimes, outsourcing or automating tasks simplifies life and frees time for more meaningful pursuits. Your time, energy, and resources are valuable; use them wisely.

4. How Does This Add Value to My Life?

Not everything that seems like a great opportunity or friendship genuinely adds value. Some endeavours extract more from us than they give in return. Take a moment to reflect on whether each commitment adds value to your life.

Are all the podcasts, courses, and books you consume truly beneficial? Do hours spent watching others’ lives on YouTube and indulging in fleeting entertainment truly enhance your life?

Question each item on your to-do list, your relationships, and the allocation of your resources. Not every “good opportunity” or “good friendship” serves your best interests. Be discerning and deliberate in your commitments.

5. What Sacrifices Must I Make?

Almost every decision carries a cost. Investments may require financial sacrifices, and building or nurturing relationships may demand time and effort. Before making any commitment, ask yourself if you’re ready for the sacrifices involved.

For instance, I once promised to help someone with her blog. Initially, it was manageable, but as my schedule changed, it became inconvenient. I realized I couldn’t maintain the commitment and had to communicate this to avoid disappointment.

Don’t start something you can’t fully commit to, as unmet responsibilities can strain relationships and lead to disappointment.

In conclusion, self-reflection is vital for setting realistic goals and making informed decisions. It provides insight into your habits, values, and priorities. By practicing mindfulness and answering these questions honestly, you can use your time productively and focus on what truly matters.

As I revisit these questions, I’m reminded of the unrealistic goals and poor decisions I’ve made in the past due to a lack of introspection. I hope you’ll read this and commit to an honest, mindful, and intentional approach to life. Above all, may you find grace in aligning with your life’s purpose. Thank you for reading; please share this post.

Also Read: 6 Daily Habits that can change your whole life

Love,
L’Queen