HOW DID WE GET HERE? ON MATERIALISM, COMPARISON AND SUCCESS

I took a week long social media break recently to just breathe and be a regular human being.  Unbothered by the incessant flow of beeping notifications from the various platforms I use and just living that regular good ol’ life that is fast becoming extinct. When I go on such breaks, I literally just go ahead and delete all the apps from my phones to avoid the temptation of opening any of them.

My husband however brought my attention to a viral video a couple of days ago, in that video 2 ladies sighted a celebrity and made serious mockery of the kind of car he drove. Going as far as tailing his car even when he had left the premises where they saw him intially. They are the real definition of “Jobless Lazy Nigerian Youths” if you ask me.

I pray those two would someday come to realization of how appalling their actions were and apologize for their folly.

I watched the video three times and for the life of me, I couldn’t help but ask the following questions;

  • How jobless could those two have been to spend their waking hours tailing someone else’s car?
  • Why would anyone assume that driving an old car makes someone less of  a human being undeserving of his right to privacy and respect?
  • How did we all get to this point that we think the worth of a person is dependent on the car they drive ?
  • How could two seemingly jobless ladies probably those of the “Small Girl Big god”  clan judge someone who has proved himself a hardworking achiever over the years a brokeass because he chose to drive one of his old cars?
  • Since when did cars become assets?
  • How can people who live in rented apartments make mockery of someone who lives in his own home because he uses an old car?

The above and a lot more raced through my mind as I watched that video. How did we get here?

materialism

How come we now rate success based on materialism?

Why does it seem like everyone is now on a rat-race to outdo the other person?

Everyday more young people are taking up terrible get-rich schemes in order to feel among and show off. From the yahoo-yahoo business to the sugar daddyism, there’s no stopping them because they have their eyes on that Chanel bag or that Porsche and they would do just anything to get it.

Many young people are neck deep in debt in the name of fashion, “pepper them gang”and slay mamaism, forgetting to run their own race but steadily following trends, struggling with comparison and fashioning their life after one so called celebrity or the other. Some people don’t have the foggiest ideas of what goes down behind the scenes, they just covet the flashy cars, peng outfits, gross materialism and the round the globe all expense paid trips often flaunted before their eyes. Is this really what we would call success?

materiaism

No doubt, some people are legit working hard and getting shit done legally in their field but best believe that the percentage of those completely legit achievers are very little compared to our slay mamas and Kinshatilowo boys.

Asides social media, the music industry also largely projects that the flashy life is the way we all should go. Which is why lyrics like “Kinshatilowo” and “Show me the money” are predominantly depicted in most music videos to make young people just desire that “high life” where they are popping bottles every friday, driving the best cars and “Living their best life” like they usually term it.

My Honest Opinion on the Materialism Craze

It’s not a crime to desire good things, it’s not a crime to want to have the finest things in life but there is a huge disparity between that and the kind of materialism that we are fast taking to be the new normal. There are two varieties of materialism that we are now adopting as young people– using possessions as a yardstick of success and seeking happiness through acquisition.

We attribute our happiness to the acquisition or possession of material things, failing to realize that just after getting that latest Rolex watch, the next day a new one is out and then we are on that race again to acquire that and the cycle goes on.

The moment you begin to compare your life with that of someone on social media especially in relation to material wealth, you are well on your path to depression. Because every single day you see them spot a new outfit you put yourself under unnecessary pressure to get that or something more fancy. How on earth would you be happy if you live life that way?

Do you know you hinder your own self fulfillment and success when you are constantly trying to keep up with the Kardashians? Anytime you compare yourself with others you are setting yourself up to feel inadequate, like a failure and that just ruins your self-worth. Why not protect your happiness and simply unfollow people who make you feel like you have to do whatever it takes to become like them or you have failed in life?

Another thing I would like to point out, is that we must be careful of the kind of perception we give others about ourselves. A major reason why celebrities would be misjudged is that a lot of times they flaunt their wealth on social media, so when their reality and social media image don’t match fans get disappointed and diss them.

I think its important to stay true to yourself and not try to act like you have it all when you really don’t. Billionaires like Mark Zuckerberg and Bill Gates would walk into a room unnoticed because they live modestly regardless of the fact that they are stupendously wealthy. So what exactly is the point of excessive show off?

 

I have learnt that not everything is as it seems, like the old saying goes “ all that glitters is not gold. You never know what people do to dress, travel or live like they do. Don’t believe the hype! There’s always more to it than they are willing to tell. For some, they are faking it till they make it, for some others they are simply doing it for the gram, trying to impress others and be invited into some kind of clique. Is that the kind of life you really want?

As a young person, one must clearly define what he/she wants in life regardless of the illusion that the outside world is constantly putting out making us believe we are missing out if we don’t possess the latest it has to offer. It’s all lies! Don’t fall for it. Fix your mind on your own set goals, your dreams, aspirations and celebrate every little progress in your life. 

Our business in life should not be to constantly look over our shoulders to see what others are doing and get stuck in a comparison trap. Even the bible says that those who compare themselves with themselves are not wise.  So it’s important to focus on your journey and keep going regardless of the distractions around.

I know it could be difficult, sometimes your mind sways and you just wonder how things are so easy for some people and you have it so tough. But always remember that everyone has a timing in life and not all flowers bloom at the same time.

Encourage yourself and like I always says, be happy about where you are but never lose the excitement of where you are going. I could go on and on on this topic but I’d like to stop here today. I covered a whole lot on this topic in my book On the Ride, You can get it here.

 

I hope you enjoyed reading this post, I just felt the need to share this with you. Kindly share this post because someone on your timeline might need it too.

 

Don’t spend your time analyzing other people’s success, use that energy to work on your personal goals and bring your own vision to life.

Run your own race, eyes on the prize!

You are not a failure!

 

Love,

 

L’queen

Photo credit: Pexels

 

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